Phrases with connotations and what to do about it?

Think about what they really mean: ▫️ CALM DOWN. "Stop feeling the way you're feeling right now." This phrase expresses an unwillingness to talk to you about your pain or anxiety, devaluing your emotions. ▫️ YOU UPSET ME. "You don't live up to my expectations." The phrase suggests that your particular action/reaction goes against what he or she imagines and expects from you. ▫️ WHAT DID YOU EXPECT? "Accept the situation as I (or someone else) accepts it." In this case, you are being asked to take responsibility for the other person's choice of how they perceive the situation. So what to do when you hear one of these phrases addressed to you? Recognize that this way people try to impose their vision on you thus forcing you to give up personal responsibility and personal choice for what happens to you.