Do you know when we begin to lose strength and feel anxiety?

When we are: • Trying to control others. • Doing what we don't want to do. • Listening to others, not ourselves. • Watching the news. • Communicating with anxious people. • Unsure how to say "no". • Discussing doctors, politics, education, gas prices. • Comparing ourselves with others • Envious of someone else's success. • Waiting for someone to change. • Waiting to be rescued. • Barely resting. • Not solving our problems.

The choice is yours

There comes a time when you get a distinguished feeling as if everyone needs something from you. Oftener remind yourself that you are the only one who can decide how much and to whom you can dedicate your energy. You always have a choice.

Simple rules to allow yourself to live the life you want

Ask yourself: • Who knows you better than you do? • Who can take care of you if not you? • Who can truly love you if you don't love yourself? • How can others respect you if you don't respect yourself?⠀ A psychologically mature person is one who can take care of himself or herself. About his or her physical and mental state, as well as safety.

January 16 is the most depressing day of the year. It's called Blue Monday.

This term was coined by psychologist Cliff Arnall, who developed a formula showing that the third Monday of January is especially gloomy: the celebration of Christmas and New Year is over, and the cold, dark January weekdays are conducive to apathy. However, according to the doctor, this day is very good for planning the future and new beginnings.

Why is it important to listen to your emotions?

The nature of emotions and feelings is very important to understand because of how different they work. There are no universal remedies to this. For example, if it's sadness, then it's enough to wrap yourself in a blanket, watch your favorite movie, think about why you’re feeling these emotions and what they signal – and everything will be better But if it's anger, rage, irritation - then, obviously, a cup of tea won't help here. The nature of emotions and their intensity are different. And the mechanisms of transformation, too. Aggressive emotions won’t go away by themselves - only through action. However, the methods can either be constructive – exercising or cleaning up, or vice versa, destructive - breaking dishes, tearing up papers, screaming. These emotions give a profound burst of energy, which is always followed by devastation. This energy must be transformed into something better.

Staying dedicated

▫Use these techniques to relax. These include meditation, yoga, stretching or breathing exercises; ▫Assign a day in the week just for taking care of yourself. Make time for yourself, listen to your favorite music, get inspired through ways that are familiar to you; ▫Write down your thoughts, keep a diary of your emotions. Take note which ones cause you tension; ▫Take breaks from work, put your phone away, abstract from the work environment; ▫Let yourself know why you work, what you get from your work, what causes the greatest discomfort and how to get rid of it.

How to get rid of exhausting relationships

Everyone has a friend or acquaintance like this. You have common emotions: you hurt each other again and again, and this process is endless. You are USED to such communication, you are comfortable in it. This is how emotional dependency happens — a vicious circle. How to deal with it? Do not hold on to brothers in misfortune. Gradually you will outgrow this relationship. Relationships with energy «vampires» and narcissists need to be thought of as poisoning: draw conclusions and no longer overlap. If this doesn't help, apply VISUALIZATION. Imagine that you and your partner are connected via a huge rope made of thin threads of light. Don't walk the tightrope of pain and negativity. Every time a loved one pours negative emotions on you, mentally cut the connection between you.

Breacrumbing or…?

Breacrumbing or…? This term succinctly describes the situation. This has happened to many and left them in deep perplexity. When we met, everything SEEMED to be mutual. Communication in social networks was really active - playful messages and clear hints from a new acquaintance. But it’s the road to nowhere, it doesn't go beyond these little amusements. Most likely, your feelings are being played INTENTIONALLY.

What do women desire

Security. We are insanely vulnerable and sensitive. Even if outwardly we build thick walls and shells, inside we always have a little fragile girl. And we really want to be taken care of. Sometimes from the outside we look like armored tanks, and you think that we don't care about you. But without it, we lose our femininity and beauty. More than anything, we want to be taken care of. It seems to us that it is not difficult to give a hand when getting off the bus, to hold the doors, to help with heavy bags, to meet us late at night from work, to listen to us in difficult times ... Perhaps this is really difficult for you - especially the last one. But we love it. For such care, we are ready to inspire you, idolize and take care of you. Even more, we want to stop working from dawn to dusk and start creating at home. Create harmony, love, atmosphere in it. We want to be close to our children, cook amazing meals for you, buy new curtains for your home. This is our nature - we want to create and be women. And perhaps it seems to you that not every woman wants this. But look into her eyes and deep inside you will see this little girl who loves to create the world around her.

What do women desire

Gratitude. We, like you, want to feel valued and needed. It is important for us to understand that you accept every prepared dinner with gratitude. That you value every clean shirt in your closet. That our beauty and grooming is important to you. We love compliments. Crazy. After all, with the help of them we feel that you love us. That you are grateful to us and close. At the same time, it is very important for us that your compliments are varied, aimed at our qualities and are sincere.

What do women desire

Proximity. Women are very social and dependent on communication. We don't understand why you're going underground. Because it's more natural for us to get together as girlfriends and chat. Everything we do in life ultimately has one purpose - to feel intimacy with other people. We really like intimate conversations with girlfriends, films about intimacy and love. And we really want to feel you, to know what's in your heart. We call you and ask: "Where are you?" several times a day. Not to control. Just to hear what you think of us. At least sometimes. We live negative emotions by talking about them. Therefore, when we see you in a serious condition, we want to talk to you so much (although at this time you want to be alone). And we want, when it is not easy for us, that you talk to us. It's not easy, especially for you. After all, we have everything together - feelings, thoughts, and events. But if you remember that we just need to speak out and cry into your shoulder - perhaps it will be easier for you. We do not want advice, recipes, summaries. We just want you to listen to us, hug us and say: “My little one, it’s probably very difficult for you right now. But I'm with you. And I love you". Yes, we want to hear all the time that you love us. For you it is stupid, but for us it is necessary as air. We want to understand that today we are as close to you as we were yesterday. That you still love us.

What do women desire

Every woman has only three needs. If you think that this is an apartment, a car and a fur coat, then you are mistaken. Everything is much easier and more accessible. These are the needs: 1. Proximity 2. Gratitude 3. Security

Infantile or naive?

At first glance, these qualities are very similar. Such a cute, almost childlike spontaneity. And yet, these are fundamentally different characteristics. NAIVETY is "I can do anything": "I don't want to know anything about the imperfection of the world and I will behave as if it doesn't exist." INFANTILISM is "I don't want to, even if I can": "I am afraid of the imperfection of the world, and I prefer to hide from it behind someone's back." All infantile people are similar in their behavior. They do not know what to do, and often do not want to make their own decisions. They take care of their own comfort and refer to "tired", "it's hard for me", "I wasn't taught", "why should I", "I'm sick". Infantile people are skilled manipulators. They live for their own pleasure, without straining themselves, feeling sorry for themselves, without learning lessons from their own mistakes. They do not analyze what is happening, do not consider necessary to develop or change something in their lives.

"Geographic way" of fighting depression and disease.

So the "geographic method" should be applied as far as finances and time allow. Sometimes two days is enough to improve your condition. But it's better for a little longer. A week or two. And by the way, short trips are even more beneficial for us than a long vacation, so we still have to go. The hardships of the journey will be forgotten, and the impressions will remain for a lifetime. “Wanderlust” is not a simple whim, and you don’t scatter money, but invest in your health, mental and physical. The "geographical method" is used in the treatment of severe depression, neurosis, various kinds of addictions - it even helps with alcoholism ... And it's nice to use this method! Antidepressants are much more expensive than a small pleasant trip ... So it's worth the trip.

"Geographic way" of fighting depression and disease.

Drive. Definitely. Even if there is little money, even if there is no time, it is still better to go on a trip. This is the so-called "geographic way" of dealing with depression and disease. And it helps perfectly - after two days of being in "another place", the symptoms of depression began to disappear, even after a bereavement. After two days of being in another place, 89 percent of people felt much better - both mentally and physically. And a 20 percent reduction in the risk of a heart attack - even thanks to a very short trip. During trips and travels, updates occur in the neurons of the brain, bad things are forgotten, new impressions are loaded. So the saying “you can’t run away from yourself” is about something else. And it is quite possible to escape from diseases and premature death. And a trip with loved ones is doubly healing - scientists have measured and calculated everything.

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Let's keep it simple - say "thank you" more often. Calling each other by their first names is also magic words. Look at each other, even if we see each other every day. Celebrating something good and new is called a “compliment”, and these are also magic words ... The main thing is not to fool yourself with all sorts of nonsense: “what if they don’t understand it like that?”, “What am I going to climb”, “but is it clear am I saying?”… So thank you for reading all of this!

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Everything, absolutely everything that I have is thanks to someone. Thanks to my parents, I generally live. Thanks to the teachers I know something. Thanks to a friend, I feel confident in the most uncomfortable situation. Thanks to some complete strangers, I can use a computer and write these words. And then - more. Thanks to the Sun, I exist - in autumn it is felt more acutely. Thanks to my dog, I gain new strength and joy in the evening. Thanks to a tree outside the window, a cloud, a squirrel in the park, the inventor of garbage bags, a polite minibus driver, a funny kid in the yard... Thanks to a loved one... Thanks to a Teacher... Thanks to your child... "Thanks"... It's a beautiful word!

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Yesterday, flying out of the entrance, I said “thank you” to the janitor holding the door - an immigrant girl. She froze in surprise, and then smiled so perplexedly ... And I felt a little ashamed. Why do I say it so rarely? "Thank you!" It's not about routine formulas of politeness. It's about the magic words. Remember as a child? "What is the magic word you know?" - "Please!" - and, like a cherished key, all the doors open, including the grandmother's cabinet with jam, the wrinkles on my mother's forehead are smoothed out ... The most important secret of magic words is that they must be pronounced. Not implied. Do not swallow. Don't take it for granted. And be sincere.

Expect the worst, hope for the best

Imagine a person working in a company whose management does not appreciate him. He has to work overtime. He is sure that if he does not do this, he will be fired. "If I don't work overtime, I will be fired. I have a young wife, I will not be able to support her and pay the housing bills, and we will lose the roof over our heads." Let's assume that this is exactly how it will be. But so what? Can’t a person ever find another job? Of course he can! Even if it takes time, even if it isn’t his dream job. The solution: ▫️Before you seal yourself in the "prison" of worries about some life situation, determine the most terrible scenario. ▫️Realize that there are no hopeless situations. ▫️Come up with an action plan to improve the current state of affairs, and move on.

From suppressing your emotions to benefiting from them

It is believed that a successful person is positive and happy at any given time, but this is a delusion and deception. By creating an enthusiastic atmosphere of joy at trainings and courses, the illusion is formed that it will accompany you in everyday life. But there is a wider range of emotions, and negative experience is integral. You need to live it and accept it without suppressing it, otherwise it's easy to become a regular client of a psychologist. Negativity can be beneficial from the point of view of personal growth, if you analyze your condition correctly and draw the right conclusions. Plus, it increases the value of positivity, which does not get boring and works even more effectively on an emotional background.