Returning to the topic of manipulation.

Narcissists like to quarrel on purpose, consciously, at the right moment. This is an element of manipulation. ▫️For example, quarrels happen just before gifting presents. Now, obviously, the person doesn’t have to gift you anything, and, as always, you are to blame. ▫️The quarrel is arranged in order not to fulfill a promise. They promised you something, but they weren't going to fulfill it. (I wanted to buy it for you, but because of your behavior and tantrums, I changed my mind.) ▫️The narcissist creates a situation so that the victim does not leave to meet with friends. Because, ideally, the victim should be isolated. After all, your whole life ‘should’ revolve around the narcissist! A few fights and now the victim no longer wishes to go to hang out with friends. It's easier for her or him not to meet their friends than to relive this nightmare again. Did you happen to notice this?

There are several questions for women who doubt the depth of their partners' feelings:

Do you think that his love is not real because he pays little attention? If you found out that it is true, how would you feel? How can you get this feeling in another way? Can you feed yourself with love? If so, how? What would you like to ask a partner about? What to find out? Is there any anxiety due to the fact that the relationship is on the verge of breaking up? If so, is this belief reasonable or do you just feel that way? On the one hand, we are familiar with that feeling when we are not loved. And yes, this feeling can be justified. It’s as if we tend to transfer old experience (our own or someone else's) to the current relationship. As for true love, try to understand: what is it? How do you feel it, what do you do and what do you get in return? And most importantly, gradually give this love to yourself. Then you definitely won't make a mistake.

Who surrounds you?

Let's do an interesting research to understand what kind of environment you have: supportive, helping you grow, or the one that slows you down? ▫️Write the names of 10 people you talk to. ▫️If a person is positive, he or she is in most cases optimistic, does not complain, is interested in self education, then put down a “+” next to his or her name. ▫️ If a person is always negative, always dissatisfied, complains, gossips, then we put “-.” Now we have two types of people: inspirers and firefighters. Inspirers are positive-minded people who will always support you with kind words. Firefighters will extinguish your enthusiasm at the first opportunity. From this day on — try to communicate more often with those who have a positive influence on you, and minimize communication with those who break plans and spoil the mood.

Friends that everyone should have

Fan - just like a football team needs fans, so we need a friend with support and faith. Faith that you will fly to the moon, just do not want to yet or are a little busy. A versatile personality is a lively person who does not sit still, and will not let you flatten the sofa. He will drag you to the mountains, to dances, to the big world - and you don't resist too much.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

7. Before an important interview, it is useful to imagine that we have a long-standing close friendship with the interviewer. It almost always depends on us how to perceive the situation, and our calmness and ease can be transmitted to the interlocutor. 8. If someone is angry with us, and at the same time we manage to remain calm, then the anger is likely to only worsen from this. However, later this person will become ashamed of his behavior. 9. When you have to do something especially responsible or requiring concentration, in a word, something that usually makes us nervous, it is worth trying to chew gum or even eat something. This is associated on a subconscious level with a sense of security, since we usually eat when nothing threatens us. 10. People tend to accept a smaller favor after they've refused us a larger one.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

3. When a group of people laughs, everyone instinctively looks at the one he likes the most (or at the one he would like to consider a close person). 4. A lot of useful information can be extracted by paying attention to the position of the interlocutor's legs. If, say, the toes of his shoes are facing the opposite direction from us, this usually means that the person wants to end the conversation as soon as possible. 5. Many of us have had occasion to attend a meeting in a situation where there was reason to expect sharp and unpleasant criticism from someone. Under such circumstances, it is best to sit next to this person. Practice shows that he will lose all his ardor and intent to attack, or at least be much softer. 6. A very useful habit is to notice the color of a person's eyes when meeting. He will unconsciously feel sympathy for us due to slightly lengthened eye contact.

10 tricky tricks from psychology that are useful to know

A few clever tricks from psychology that can make people feel or even act a certain way. Often the style of our behavior affects other people on a subconscious level. We may not even be aware of the effect produced. These tips can be very useful, but you can only verify this from your own experience. So worth a try! 1. If we manage to force ourselves to be sincerely happy when meeting someone, the next time we meet, this person will be glad to see us. By the way, dogs do this trick with us all the time. 2. When you go on a first date, it's smart to take your partner somewhere exciting. Subsequently, positive emotions from this meeting will be associated with us.

How to fight laziness?

The best way to cope with laziness is to find motivation in activities you really love. You should strive to do only what you want to do. Within the law and within the bounds of reason, of course ⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Use less electronics and take more time off the Internet. So much use of electronic devices affects our brain health.⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Don't be afraid to stay alone. Take a day of silence once a month . ▫️ Write a plan of tasks (working or personal). After you write a plan, you'll have a burst of motivation to do all those things. ▫️ Start eating healthy. You are what you eat. Stop eating junk food that only ruins your health. ⠀ ⠀ ▫️ Run in the morning. Exercising in the morning will make you feel more energized throughout the day.

Delayed Life Syndrome

People, who constantly puts things off, and say to themselves phrases like that: "it's for a holiday," "I'll wait for a special occasion," "I'll rest after retirement," etc. suffer from the delayed life syndrome. It all comes from a deep childhood and low self-esteem. Parents often impose these views on their children, and then children do the same on their children. This syndrome can be compared to a road to "nowhere". The person wants nothing, they only do that he or she is urged. Such a person is completely miserable because life is passing by him or her. Thousands of people hate their school, their university, their job, the country they live in. Yet they continue to do nothing, complain about life, and continue to postpone pleasant and important things in life. When a person of this kind is sad, he or she begins to fight depression by gorging on foods, which leads to health issues.

Advice for anyone who wants to achieve something in this life

3. Be aware of what you are doing! Who are you, where are you and what exactly are you doing right now - these simple questions will help you get out of the inert state of inactivity, because of which people constantly postpone their affairs for later. This state does not allow us to change our comfortable and habitual existence, hinders our development. 4. There are no failures, there is experience! Even if you encounter problems along the way to your goal, remember that this is just an opportunity to correct your path, and not a reason to go the distance. 5. Just get started! It is human nature to doubt. You will never be able to 100% predict your path and get rid of your doubts. Action is the best cure for uncertainty and fear.

Advice for anyone who wants to achieve something in this life

1. Stop thinking bad about yourself! You are a unique person, doubting and not believing in yourself, you insult the great power that brought you to this beautiful world. Remind yourself of this often. 2. What others think of you is their business! If a person has not succeeded in the area in which he judges you, then his opinion is worth nothing. Developing people follow successful people and model them. They don't have time to judge. Judgment of others is the lot of losers who are marking time and are afraid to act. Are you interested in the opinion of losers?

Healthy relationships are freedom

• Freedom from shaking: where, with whom. Instead of control - trust, which grows out of a wonderful combination of "said and done." • Freedom from shame: I'm somehow different, not correct enough, smart, beautiful, good, and so on. Both know who they have chosen and accept each other for who they are. • Freedom from fear: to turn wrong, look wrong, be punished. In a healthy relationship, you can relax (not to be confused with permissiveness) and be a living person.

Common Gaslighting Phrases

▫️ "You made me do it..." Shifting responsibility for their inappropriate behavior. ▫️ "You're the only problem..." Denying their role in the conflict. ▫️ "You're crazy, I don't know what you're talking about..." Distorting your reality and your view of yourself. ▫️ " It's your own opinion, but no one would ever agree with you..." Creating fictional supporters to strengthen their position. ▫️ "You need to let it go, it's gone..." Justifying their unacceptable behavior. ▫️ "You imagined it, it wasn't like that..." Distorting your reality in order to prove their point of view. ▫️ "No one will love you like I do. Look at you, who needs you? No one will withstand you..." Distorting your reality in order to belittle you and your dignity.

Senior advice that you don't need to listen to

"At your age, it's time to get married and have children" The addressee of the message may be 20 or 40 years old, but the meaning is the same: his life path does not correspond to the generally accepted one. The average scenario looks like this: get an education, find a job, get married, give birth to your first child in a year or two, then think about the second. And if you somehow do not meet public expectations, then it is perceived as a tragedy. At any age and under any circumstances, the decision to have a child should be meaningful, otherwise, instead of one happy person, you risk getting several unhappy ones.

The strongest response to a sneaky blow is silence.

Especially when you are expected to respond. The longer you pause, the better. Let them think what's on your mind. Let them consider options for your answers to their meanness, startle at every stranger who comes in, see you in every random aggressive fake and in every sharp quote that you repost on your wall. A person who has treated you meanly will definitely think that these are all your machinations. It would never occur to him that intelligent people do not exchange for any nonsense, and if they serve revenge, then as a cold dish. And the smart ones do not take revenge at all, they just live their lives. They are just happy!

Laws of Happiness

1. Believe in your happiness. Believe that this is possible for you. Faith is a belief, the perception of something as a fact, for no apparent reason. That's how a happy life, you need to believe, "that I can be happy, without clear evidence." 2. Be ready for happiness if it suddenly comes. This is your answer to the question: “What next?” It will definitely come if you can well imagine the events that will happen after ... 3. Do not wish, but intend to become happy. There is a rather large distance between desire and intention - an abyss. Dreaming of being happy is a hobby for the soul, which is nice to do from time to time. Intention is a state of mind and body with the intent to become one.

Types of toxic men

He scolds your body. Every time you put on your favorite item, he suggests putting on another one because it reveals something you'd be better off hiding. He says "chick" or "wench". If it's a joke, please. But a person who seriously calls all the surrounding women that way, including, perhaps, you, is clearly not one of those who respects "chicks." He says hurtful things and then turns everything into a joke He claims that in this outfit you look ten years older, and when you are offended, he adds that he was joking, and you have no sense of humor.

Protect yourself from harmful thoughts

Sometimes we develop firm erroneous beliefs, which are extremely difficult to overcome. It seems to you that they are a part of you, but they are not. A person is plastic by nature and can accept any attitude if he forms it long enough and persistently. This ability can be useful. Track down the beliefs that prevent you from living: low self-esteem, lack of opportunity for change, and so on. Ask yourself questions, become your own psychiatrist. For example, if you feel uncomfortable in the company, ask yourself: "Why did I decide that shyness is my natural quality?", "What prevents me from communicating freely?", "Have I always felt squeezed in the company of other people?", "When did it start?"

Don't be afraid to refuse someone

Sometimes it can be very difficult to say no. Especially if you are used to achieving your goals and doing everything carefully. It is not easy to change a job that is unsuitable for you, to give up a difficult relationship. You have to admit that you are not coping and something is beyond your capabilities. And this is extremely unpleasant. When psychologists advise setting boundaries, avoiding excessive workload and not imposing excessive obligations on yourself, it seems that they are talking about simple and obvious things. In fact, it's not fun at all to explain to the boss why you are increasingly taking time off "due to illness". It's even less pleasant to finally admit that you can't pull off a full-time job and leave your current place.

Not everyone needs love.

Some live without it at all. And some homeopathic doses give out love. Or are able to learn only grains and grams. Because of this, so much suffering is caused by people to each other. Due to different energy consumption. And then somehow they interact all the same, if they stay together. But this is not a very happy relationship. Happy love - when the ability to give and the need to receive coincide, when the energy intensity is the same. Ηo this rarely happens. And some yearn for love, others choke on it. Some fountain with tenderness and love, others lightly drizzle and drip drop by drop. Oh, it's still love. Oh what ect. Because for many, the barometer shows "great land" initially. And the thermometer is absolute zero. They give nothing and cannot contain anything. They are completely lifeless, like a herbarium. And the worst thing is to love such a person; he doesn't need anything. And there is nothing to give you to him ...