What do women desire

Every woman has only three needs. If you think that this is an apartment, a car and a fur coat, then you are mistaken. Everything is much easier and more accessible. These are the needs: 1. Proximity 2. Gratitude 3. Security

Infantile or naive?

At first glance, these qualities are very similar. Such a cute, almost childlike spontaneity. And yet, these are fundamentally different characteristics. NAIVETY is "I can do anything": "I don't want to know anything about the imperfection of the world and I will behave as if it doesn't exist." INFANTILISM is "I don't want to, even if I can": "I am afraid of the imperfection of the world, and I prefer to hide from it behind someone's back." All infantile people are similar in their behavior. They do not know what to do, and often do not want to make their own decisions. They take care of their own comfort and refer to "tired", "it's hard for me", "I wasn't taught", "why should I", "I'm sick". Infantile people are skilled manipulators. They live for their own pleasure, without straining themselves, feeling sorry for themselves, without learning lessons from their own mistakes. They do not analyze what is happening, do not consider necessary to develop or change something in their lives.

"Geographic way" of fighting depression and disease.

So the "geographic method" should be applied as far as finances and time allow. Sometimes two days is enough to improve your condition. But it's better for a little longer. A week or two. And by the way, short trips are even more beneficial for us than a long vacation, so we still have to go. The hardships of the journey will be forgotten, and the impressions will remain for a lifetime. “Wanderlust” is not a simple whim, and you don’t scatter money, but invest in your health, mental and physical. The "geographical method" is used in the treatment of severe depression, neurosis, various kinds of addictions - it even helps with alcoholism ... And it's nice to use this method! Antidepressants are much more expensive than a small pleasant trip ... So it's worth the trip.

"Geographic way" of fighting depression and disease.

Drive. Definitely. Even if there is little money, even if there is no time, it is still better to go on a trip. This is the so-called "geographic way" of dealing with depression and disease. And it helps perfectly - after two days of being in "another place", the symptoms of depression began to disappear, even after a bereavement. After two days of being in another place, 89 percent of people felt much better - both mentally and physically. And a 20 percent reduction in the risk of a heart attack - even thanks to a very short trip. During trips and travels, updates occur in the neurons of the brain, bad things are forgotten, new impressions are loaded. So the saying “you can’t run away from yourself” is about something else. And it is quite possible to escape from diseases and premature death. And a trip with loved ones is doubly healing - scientists have measured and calculated everything.

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Let's keep it simple - say "thank you" more often. Calling each other by their first names is also magic words. Look at each other, even if we see each other every day. Celebrating something good and new is called a “compliment”, and these are also magic words ... The main thing is not to fool yourself with all sorts of nonsense: “what if they don’t understand it like that?”, “What am I going to climb”, “but is it clear am I saying?”… So thank you for reading all of this!

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Everything, absolutely everything that I have is thanks to someone. Thanks to my parents, I generally live. Thanks to the teachers I know something. Thanks to a friend, I feel confident in the most uncomfortable situation. Thanks to some complete strangers, I can use a computer and write these words. And then - more. Thanks to the Sun, I exist - in autumn it is felt more acutely. Thanks to my dog, I gain new strength and joy in the evening. Thanks to a tree outside the window, a cloud, a squirrel in the park, the inventor of garbage bags, a polite minibus driver, a funny kid in the yard... Thanks to a loved one... Thanks to a Teacher... Thanks to your child... "Thanks"... It's a beautiful word!

The secret of magic words is that they must be spoken

Yesterday, flying out of the entrance, I said “thank you” to the janitor holding the door - an immigrant girl. She froze in surprise, and then smiled so perplexedly ... And I felt a little ashamed. Why do I say it so rarely? "Thank you!" It's not about routine formulas of politeness. It's about the magic words. Remember as a child? "What is the magic word you know?" - "Please!" - and, like a cherished key, all the doors open, including the grandmother's cabinet with jam, the wrinkles on my mother's forehead are smoothed out ... The most important secret of magic words is that they must be pronounced. Not implied. Do not swallow. Don't take it for granted. And be sincere.

Expect the worst, hope for the best

Imagine a person working in a company whose management does not appreciate him. He has to work overtime. He is sure that if he does not do this, he will be fired. "If I don't work overtime, I will be fired. I have a young wife, I will not be able to support her and pay the housing bills, and we will lose the roof over our heads." Let's assume that this is exactly how it will be. But so what? Can’t a person ever find another job? Of course he can! Even if it takes time, even if it isn’t his dream job. The solution: ▫️Before you seal yourself in the "prison" of worries about some life situation, determine the most terrible scenario. ▫️Realize that there are no hopeless situations. ▫️Come up with an action plan to improve the current state of affairs, and move on.

From suppressing your emotions to benefiting from them

It is believed that a successful person is positive and happy at any given time, but this is a delusion and deception. By creating an enthusiastic atmosphere of joy at trainings and courses, the illusion is formed that it will accompany you in everyday life. But there is a wider range of emotions, and negative experience is integral. You need to live it and accept it without suppressing it, otherwise it's easy to become a regular client of a psychologist. Negativity can be beneficial from the point of view of personal growth, if you analyze your condition correctly and draw the right conclusions. Plus, it increases the value of positivity, which does not get boring and works even more effectively on an emotional background.

Realize your responsibility

What happens in your life depends overwhelmingly you yourself. You must take responsibility for every action you take, and not shift it to others. At the same time, you need to remember about some boundaries and limits. There are circumstances that cannot be influenced, and there are always other people around with their own interests and goals. To be responsible for everything that happens is impossible and even destructive. The most telling example: a child feeling guilty about his parents' divorce. By taking responsibility for our own deeds, we gain a resource for personal growth. By trying to take responsibility for circumstances beyond our control, we hinder the development of others and usually begin to doubt our own abilities. That's why it's so important to strike that balance.

Remember that your comfort zone makes you mentally stronger

The idea of getting out of the comfort zone has long been the butt of jokes. This idea is familiar even to children. It makes sense that a person from a small town would find it strange to hear about stepping out of the comfort zone from a coach living in Manhattan. Yes, uncomfortable life events can bring some progress in your career or personal life, but this kind of thing will only work if you are absolutely used to your current situation and have fenced yourself off from any challenges. In other cases, the comfort zone is the normal state in which you feel mentally safe. If you leave it too often or never come back to it, it is more likely to get mental health problems instead of achieving goals of personal growth.

How to protect yourself from toxic people

▫️ Don't argue Oh yes, toxic people are masters at stirring up arguments and scandals. Don't be fooled, try to control your emotions. If you engage in an argument, your opponent will not shy away from even the dirtiest methods and will eventually come out the winner. In addition, this way you will make nothing in order to get out of a toxic relationship, but rather you will get stuck in it even more. ▫️ Change your tactics If you foresee a difficult conversation with a toxic person, think about what you're going to talk about and how you're going to talk. Take the lead, dominate the situation, ask as many questions as you wish, bring that person back to reality, tell them something that matters to you.

The universe is not against you

Living according to the principles of Wu-Wei, means that we must first recognize our connection to everything in nature. Although we need to have clear limits, we also need to remain open and unafraid of vulnerability, just like children running and playing outside the fence of a park. Then we can contemplate nature, feel the flow of the world's energy, and learn to live in harmony with it. Realizing that the universe is not against us, and that we don't have to confront it, brings a sense of freedom.

The restless mind needs to be quieted

Even if we take no action, our mind often continues fidgeting. According to Wu-Wei, not only the body, but also the mind needs to be quieted. Otherwise we cannot determine whether we are acting following the world's energy flows or just indulging our ego. Lao Tzu said that anyone and everyone should observe and listen to their own inner voice and to the voices of the environment.

Lack of action does not equal idleness

Wu-Wei means in Chinese non-doing or 'doing nothing'. Chinese philosophers considered it a natural way of life as opposed to actively pursuing goals or forcing events. Wu-Wei, however, should not be confused with idleness. It is not an excuse to sit back and criticize others. According to this teaching, one should not waste energy but act only when the time is right.

Be cool

Equanimity is an extremely important quality of leadership. People around you feel calm and subconsciously recognize you as a leader. But how do you learn to take the initiative and look confident? Learn to hide certain gestures. Try not to jerk your head, do not make sudden movements, do not turn improvised objects in your hands. Be status even alone with yourself.

When a person is loved, they will certainly worry about him.

For his life, health, state of mind. It has nothing to do with control, jealousy and possessiveness. “How do you feel?”, “Be careful”, “When you get there, be sure to call.” These simple, at first glance, words are pronounced because they are very worried about someone and are afraid of losing him, but not from their own life, but from life in general. This speaks volumes, because there is someone for whom it is very important that you are alive and well and just walk on this Earth. The absence of anxiety speaks of one thing - he simply does not care about you ...

Jealousy. How to deal with it?

Constant and strong jealousy usually indicates that there is a fairly serious problem either in a relationship or within a person’s personality. At the very least, each of us may well take responsibility for our lives and feelings, deal with them on our own or with the help of a psychologist.

Jealousy. How to deal with it?

In most cases, we do not think about the fact that under jealousy a variety of feelings can be hidden, and jealousy serves only as a cover, a kind of screen. And there are a lot of feelings here, and it’s not immediately clear which one of them follows which one. The list is endless and for each person in his particular story, it will, of course, be individual: anxiety, fear, sadness, anger and many other feelings. It is important, I think, not to ignore the situation when jealousy brings excessive suspicion, humiliation and control over the life and behavior of another person. This is already a signal that it is time to think about the true causes of jealousy.

Jealousy. How to deal with it?

Learn not to be jealous - you can! I don’t have a universal recipe, but the first thing a jealous person should start with is to take a journey into the depths of their personality and raise their own self-esteem. When you feel with every cell of your being that you are accepted as you are and you are attractive to another person, then the need to keep a partner will go away by itself, he will be there. And you just need to be near him.