"Yes, I can"

Make "Yes, I can" an integral part of life Do you want to become a famous actor, a cool musician or an accomplished businessman? Imagine that you have already reached the top. If something bothers you, get rid of it at the level of thoughts, try to change your thinking. Then tell yourself more often: “I can do it!”. These two components will remove the barrier in your head, and you will understand that everything is possible! Everything starts with thoughts.

Task filtering

Our daily plans can include dozens of tasks related to work, home or self-development at once. And that's okay. However, the longer our to-do list gets, the harder it gets to work with. This list creates a lot of problems: ▪️It is difficult to immediately find the right tasks in it. ▪️We are distracted by things that we absolutely do not need now. ▪️A large list gives us "mental discomfort". Too many things are always stressful. Fortunately, all of these problems are easily solved with one very simple trick. Leave on your list only those tasks that you are going to do right now. Pros: ▪️We no longer need to “look out” for the necessary tasks, because now we only see them. ▪️We are no longer distracted by extraneous tasks, because they are simply not on our list. ▪️Our initial list has become smaller and "less stressful".

Which side of the triangle are you on?

Imagine that a triangle is drawn on the floor of your room. Each of its peaks has its own name: 1st corner - financial result 2nd corner - recognition of others 3rd corner - own growth Think about what is really important to you and stand on these peaks. You can stand on one corner, you can take 2 at once, but you won’t be able to stand on all corners at the same time. You're not a centipede, you only have 2 legs, right? Therefore, it is better to focus on one or two indicators in order to accurately achieve a good result.

Keep track of your every thought, which contains criticism, evaluation, condemnation, and so on

Let's say you're walking down the street and you see a woman in ridiculous clothes, then instead of thinking about how you could choose your wardrobe and combine things, think of, say, 5 compliments addressed to her. Or any reason to look like that. Perhaps she is such a creative person that others will pick up her idea and will also be happy to dress like that. Or maybe they called her in the morning and told the sad news, and it was not at all up to thinking what clothes to choose. The main thing is not to jump out of the house naked in a panic. By learning to think without judgment, it will be easier for you to accept not only the world around you as it is, but also yourself. And this will add completely different colors to life, enliven it and make it more saturated.

Psychological age

Under psychological age, it is customary to understand a person’s ability to realize his “I” in the world around him, a person’s subjective feeling of his age, the correspondence of a person’s actions and behavior to socially expected patterns for his age. Simply put, if you sincerely believe that your age and what you should be doing at your age is solely a problem of the conservative thinking of others, you are very young at heart. If you are clearly sure that modern music is no good, today's cinema has fallen below the plinth, and "it's cold in sneakers in winter" - with a high degree of probability your psychological age is older than your passport. Of course, unless you recently celebrated your 80th birthday and live somewhere in the Arctic.

Development of discipline

Discipline is based on HABITS. That is, on the almost unconscious repetition of any actions. But this does not mean that discipline is the mindless following of a conventional plan. To implement it, you just need to turn on the brain and consciously control yourself. As long as you mentally force or motivate yourself to EVERY action you need, it will be very easy to break loose. It will be more effective to take simple steps "on the machine", that is, simply because you have decided to do them in advance.

Visualization

To properly use the visualization technique, follow this pattern: - Take a comfortable position of the body and close your eyes. - Imagine that you are in a calm and pleasant place where you can easily relax. - Maintain the visual image and focus on feeling relaxed. Detail the image, presenting it in all its details (the sound of the waves or the singing of birds). Feeling that it is not possible to plunge deeper into the state, begin to slowly return to the real world. Open your eyes and breathe slowly for a few minutes.

Planning technique

The essence of the technique is that you consider your whole life as a whole and build all your plans and actions on a solid basis of individual principles. The foundation of the pyramid is your core values ​​in life. "Who do I want to become in this life, what do I plan to achieve?" - answer this question first Global goals and a plan to achieve them are fixing specific "milestones" on your way to the implementation of the first point (foundation) A long-term plan is a division of global goals into sub-items: for example, in a year you plan to increase earnings by 50%, in 2 years - by another 50%, etc.

The beginning of self-development.

The beginning of self-development often stems from our feeling that something must change, something that has always needed us to work on and improve, that feeling that something is not going well, this may be the absence of a specific goal that you want to reach or perhaps not The ability to express your opinions and thoughts because of your lack of self-confidence.

Learn body language according to psychology

1- Lifting the eyebrow: Raising the eyebrows indicates discomfort, surprise, or fear of people. 2- The smile: The smile is real when wrinkles appear around the eyes, but if those wrinkles do not appear, this indicates that the smile is fake and unreal. 3- Laughter: A person who responds with humor and laughter indicates that he likes the person he is talking to, and wants to build a relationship with him, whether it is a casual or romantic relationship. 4- Interlacing the legs: Psychologically, cross-legged movement indicates that a person is not open emotionally, mentally, and physically, which means that they are less likely to change their mind in negotiations and conversations. 5- Exaggerated gestures: When you tell someone something and they nod excessively, it means that they are worried about what you think of them or doubt their ability to follow your instructions.” 6- Walking: Extension of the footsteps, erect stature, moving the shoulders and raising the head when walking, all are signs of strength, confidence, greatness and attractiveness in your personality, so try to clothe your gait with them.

How beautiful is the stage of maturity that you reach

When you do not care about the late reply and do not care about knowing anything about anyone and you are not curious to know something that does not belong to you, you reach to be satisfied with yourself, your family and your close friends, and that your relationship is limited with people and you do not feel your need to justify and do not wait for excuses or anything else.

WHY IS IT SO DIFFICULT TO REACH YOUR HUSBAND?

In fact, men love to be asked for help. It's just that the whole problem is in the "spoiled phone". Women don't convey their requests correctly. Their biggest mistake is the desire for a man to understand everything without words. Another misconception of women: "He must help me, because we are now a couple / spouses." And this very “should” becomes a stumbling block in all emerging issues. Whatever the request is about - money or household chores, it is important to ASK, and not present. Some ladies prefer to "nag". Others put pressure on pity, posing as a victim. Still others are generally silent and wait for the weather by the sea.

"I" - MESSAGES

When we want to express our dissatisfaction with a partner, it is advisable to talk about our feelings, and not about his behavior. Don't say, "You broke my favorite cup, how could you?!" Better to replace: “When you broke my cup, I was very upset - I liked it so much.” When you talk about yourself, you move the interlocutor from the position of the accused to a position where you can show sympathy, admit that you were wrong yourself, or offer to correct the situation.

HOW THE RELATIONSHIP OF A MAN AND A WOMAN IS ORGANIZED

The main function of a woman in a relationship is not soup and cleaning, as it might seem, and not even the birth of children, but first of all, the inspiration of her man. It is the woman who gives the energy that encourages him to work, perform feats, develop and move on. On this energy, he can work for the good of the family, protect his woman and children, realize himself professionally and spiritually. As a rule, at the beginning of the novel, there are no problems with this. Both man and woman show their best qualities, and everything functions as if by itself. But in an established relationship, a man eventually begins to miss the most important thing - inspiration. And then he can start - no, not necessarily cheating, but interested in other women.

WHY SHOULD A WOMAN TEACH FEMININENESS?

The woman is out of touch with her femininity. He does not know how to attract the attention of a man, to interest him and arouse a desire to care. Such a woman hardly understands herself. Desires, for example, of romance and being behind a man with the fear of never getting it, struggle in it. And she convinces herself that this is all for chickens. Envy and devalues ​​those who can afford it all. It is difficult for her to succeed. Spends energy to prove that she is no worse than men. It develops aggression, rigidity, cynicism. The way of life is changing. More masculine activities, masculine energy, maybe smoking, stress, struggle, including with your nature.

Nothing will be the same

We must adapt to the rapidly changing reality. But the stress makes it harder. I suggest you learn a technique that will help you pull yourself together. Exercise: "being a bystander" Imagine yourself as an outsider in this situation. Look at yourself from a different perspective, as if you are a character in a movie. In no case should you get involved, you have to make sure you’re not under any stress. Just observe the situation: who is involved in the conflict, how they behave, what they’re saying. The main thing is to remain a silent spectator, an observer. If necessary, mentally build a barrier in front of you that will not allow you to plunge into conflict again.

The «What if I died right now?» guilt trip manipulation

Says, for example, your mother. Is that supposed to be a joke? Well, it’s not funny at all. In fact, it’s a very common type of manipulation. With a very difficult internal decision to make as a result - to go along with it! A sense of duty and a sense of guilt will follow, planted in the brain by an experienced adult in the most subtle way. What is bad about such a relationship? Exhausting megatons of your energy. These relationships last for decades. Some children were "lucky" to grow up in such an environment. How to fix this? To begin with, understand that this is pure manipulation. And since there is no way to distance yourself from the object (it’s your mother for crying out loud), then start changing your attitude to the situation. Do not react, rather ignore her statements. It’s important to ignore such behavior METHODICALLY.

Love should be earned

What does that mean? A person in a relationship begins to "pay" with his health, do more than he wants, expect reward, sacrifice, give the clothes off their backs. Why does this happen? Most often, this is not a sign of great love or devotion, but a sign of approaching childhood trauma and codependent relationships. This person is reminded how, as a child, they could not just get love and so they paid with themselves, their body, desires or emotions to earn love, because children have nothing but that. Nothing to pay with but yourself. And that’s monstrous.

People are not born evil

Experience makes them evil.⠀ Experience hurts and scars people, causing them to see danger everywhere. Experience dictates what good is, which often does not coincide with our understanding of it. Experience dictates a certain form of love, but sometimes this form does not suit us at all. In many ways, experience shapes consciousness. Together it’s a lot more than we inherent from mother nature.⠀

What makes a good parent?

Firstly, the ability to restrain as well as restrain oneself. Don’t bite the bullet, rather refrain from expressive emotions to avoid interrupting communication. Secondly, it’s understanding why we are making this or that decision. Why do we forbid, why do we make mistakes. Understanding how our decisions will affect the character and fate of our child. Thirdly, the ability to clearly distinguish between the boundary of your desires and the desires of the child. For example, you were engaged in hockey, but for a number of reasons did not achieve the desired results. And so you shift your hockey dreams onto the head of your own son. And he, by the way, dreams of playing the guitar.